http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/7/71/Haiku.ogg
After reading the wikipedia article on Haiku, I realize that what I write is psuedo-haiku. That’s fine. I’ll just proceed with formulating the PSI psuedohaikulendar! No sweat.
Here’s a month:
1. My Garden is happy
When I tuck a slice of sky
Into the dark Earth
2. Sweet song of a bird
Awake in the gray morning
Where are you going?
3. Thousands of black ants
swarming madly to escape
I’m just watering
4. Seed-leaves show themselves
Sitting up in their wee beds
Ready for the Sun
5. Change is something real
with diapers and the eliete
for the same reason
6. Purple flower plant
how you escape from your box!
that will be your doom
7. Those shoes are too big
why not try the ones we bought
intended for you
8. Five little monkeys
they were jumping on the bed
ASPCA
9. I have a space rock
a metiorite of iron
it has seen some shit
10. Love is a banquet
fill up your Proga belly
with feelings of joy
11. T.V. is the death
of the imagination
better make it quick
12. Those who fight survive
but what does all that combat
do to the spirit?
13. There lives a vampire
over on Catalina
lives is the wrong word
14. fireplace in the room
It’s such a curious thing
controlled destruction
15. Labor all day long
one of Mother Nature’s ways
to help go to sleep
16. My package has come
I just need to wait for the
labels to arrive
17. Clear and liquid shine
more than half of all things
that we know in life
18. the eighteenth haiku
has proved to be the hardest
How old I have grown!
19. The tile on the floor
has been set in a fashion
He called it “Versailles”
20. Slitting clouds is fun
and is an excellent way
to call out the Sun
21. Let a day go by
nourish the body and mind
then return to it
22. Sometimes the phone rings
it’s the voice of a robot
saying robot things
23. You look very nice
oh, wait a minute, that’s right
you have work today
24. Mystical treasure
awaits the clever heroes
and heroines too
25. patince is virtue
in spite of having said that
I want it right now!
26. Ninjas surround you
you are unable to tell
until it’s too late
27. You should brush your teeth
the other choice is to eat
everything by straw
28. People should slow down
they’re missing all the cool stuff!
it may not repeat
29. Games are made for fun
an amazing industry
bent on making toys
30. When I start to run
every part of my body
feels like it’s dying
31. The labels have come!
I must fill up the vessels
and make them look nice
Boosh. On to month number two!
32. It had rained last night
I brought a towel with me
to wipe down the slide
33. The sky is silver
a cold wind comes from the West
study cloud bellies
34. A hood is handy
if your goal is to keep warm
and it looks cool too
35. Bright colors are fun
with red, orange, yellow, green, blue
indigo, violet
36. Yay! Roly Polies!
gentle friends from my childhood
they roll into balls
37. It’s wise to take care
when walking on a wet floor
so that you don’t fall
38. going down a slide
It’s okay to holler “WHEEE!”
even when older
39. panic is no good
it only makes you anxious
feeding the problem
40. Two tigers there are
in the center of my heart
which one will be fed?
41. my kids like to bake
they can make food with wood chips
loaded with fiber
42. It’s been brought to mind
that being compassionate
is better for health
43. Geometry’s cool
you can plug in some numbers
and get some nice shapes
44. I learned a new word
Absurdism, and it means
meaning is madness
45. my wife washed her car
within forty-eight hours
rain un-did her work
46. Insects eat my crops
but I will not consent to
eat poison for that
47. Chips fall where they may
but lo! when you roll the dice
twenties every time.
48. hole in the left knee
of every pair of my jeans
playing with my kids
49. Green badge of courage
I wear my grass stains with pride
Chlorophyll is king!
50. When I take back charge
a hidden diaper is found
that irks me sometimes
51. I enjoy the beach
the sky seems a bit more pure
filtered by the sea
52. fake plants are stupid
their auric fields are quite weak
and their smell is blank
53. There is a theory
gum chewing feeds the brain blood
which explains my mind
54. people hate to wait
they should invest in mind-games
to help pass the time
55. sometimes I laugh when
I’m driving and get cut off
by a Jesusfreak
56. Pride has a defense
against being broken down
or even looked at
57. If you have an itch
gently scratch it until gone
otherwise, get checked
58. fear is dangerous
it is also contagious
banish it with faith
59. boats are pretty cool
buoyancy allows objects
to float on water
60. God is all power
and yet god is also love
where does dumb come from?
61. Agnostics don’t know
Atheists are quite certain
what do you believe?
Third month may show improvements:
62. I bring some paper
when I go on nature walks
with my two children
63. didn’t write haiku
but found a bunch of cool rocks
I filled my pocket
64. My girl has some grapes
I show her our growing vine
explain they are bought
65. My cat sometimes meows
more frequently rubs my leg
it hurts when he bites
66. hello blue flower
on the wrong side of the fence
I don’t know your name
67. My cat never fails
to get his white fur on me
when I wear black clothes
68. the cat had a sis
she always got black fur
on light colored clothes.
69. Peace is a treasure
be mindful to treat it so
else it cannot last
70. We can be honest
we no longer need to hide
grey is the new black
71. I love all of you
far more than I deserve to
and that is quite cool.
72. To quote a Billy,
“Youth is wasted on the young”
ain’t that some true dirt.
73. When I eat apples
sometimes I will eat the core
must not waste fiber
74. a shower feels good
too bad our water heater
is a late sleeper
75. the idiot box
notice it’s called programming
for a good reason
76. I love my compost
it is an authentic thrill
to tend grubs and worms
77. where are the rabbits?
I used to see at least two
each day at sundown.
78. give your limbs a stretch
the muscles, bones and fascia
will give thanks by nerve
79. clean dust from corners
you will come to find your mind
also follows suit
80. the bitter aloe
is used to treat skin trouble
and constipation
81. the sun does exist
even though it’s cold and dark
the clouds between us
82. Listening is hard
delay the gift of advice
until it’s asked for
83. explore the landscape
of your own human body
with an appendage
84. how many purses
does one person need to have?
I bet you’ll get more.
85. hurry up and wait
’cause time is of the essence
coffee before bed
86. defensive driver
try not to pass on the right
and slow the heck down
87. each day is special
and therefore will require
a fresh pair of drawers
88. are you truly mad?
or am I just paranoid?
afraid to ask you.
89. no more poetry
please, I have things to get done
I must concentrate.
90. I’m in my office
it’s the only room that has
towels and a toilet
91. Three classes of rock:
igneous, metamorphic,
sedimentary.
92.
