Amidst my Wild Mood Swings I sometimes experience a time when I feel okay. I am on a great adventure, I am not alone and I am receiving gifts and help. I will continue trudging forward and learning. As I go, I am pleased to see the interconnectedness of things which interest me. The world seems better behaved when I have plenty of sleep.
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Today I suddenly gave my kids a break when I realized that I don’t obey well either.
Malmater,
Huru of Creation and Obliteration
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0098067/quotes?qt0359369
“Tod: You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car – hell, you even need a license to catch a fish. But they’ll let any butt-reaming asshole be a father.”
That’s a quote from the 1989 comedy “Parenthood.” It has come to mind more than once so far in my experience as a dad. I wonder if I am really qualified to be responsible for my own health and well being, much less a future steward of our planet. I still consider myself a new parent, even though I am currently on my second run.
There are many enjoyable moments one can experience as a parent. I particularly enjoy my second and third childhoods, observing the wonder of sights and sounds which I daily take for granted. Playing silly games, laughing, smiling full bore: these are some of the benefits one can get from taking care of a little one.
I am not certain where my extra reserves of endurance and patience spring from. I am in the process of trying to grow out of being a selfish, needy, emotional, impatient tyrant who leads the charge of a ‘nation of one’ (lately). My kids sure give me someone else more important than me to think about.
The whole experience may simply satisfy a genetic desire to protect and promote my young, but I wouldn’t dismiss a spiritual element at work. I have never known love as deep as that which I have for my son and daughter. It has been a lot of hard work and tears, but so far it’s been worth it.